“Who’s your daddy?” This is the infamous slogan of commercialised intimacy. A masculine Mandingo demands an answer, while his submissive remnant of a woman is supposed to respond with “Yes, you are my daddy!” Eric Zorn deconstructed the phrase in a piece in the Chicago Tribune. He described it as “a boastful claim of dominance […]
sex
Posted inEquality, Lifestyle
Vagina politics
I found my daughter fiddling with her vagina in the bathtub. The said vagina will here forth be referred to as a pony, it is far too cute to be burdened with the responsibilities that come with having a vagina. She was in the bath and suspiciously quiet, bath time is always her opportunity to […]
Posted inEquality
How not to write about African women and sex
By Gcobani Qambela This weekend I read a New York Times (NYT) article that is guilty of all traditional, white, western feminist mishaps when it comes to writing about African women and their sexuality. The article titled “Talking About Sex in Mali” is bereft of any holistic overview of the lives African women and is […]
Posted inEquality, Tech
Facebook’s ‘other’ gender problem
By Gcobani Qambela I have always kept the “About” me section on my Facebook very minimal. But recently I decided to update it and fill it up a little. I was shocked when I got to the icon on “gender” to find that it offered only two options for me to choose from and those […]
Posted inEquality
Eureka!
I recently joined a new department at work and found myself at yet another empty desk begging to be adorned with baby pictures, perhaps plastic flowers and any other paraphernalia that attempts to bring a sense of belonging to a place that you would rather not be in. If not to only placate the nudity […]
Posted inLifestyle
Why is 50 Shades selling?
Like Prof Ron Nicolson, writing last week in ‘Maritzburg’s daily The Witness, I’m hesitant to criticise a book I’ve never (and have no urge to) read. But why has EL James’s 50 Shades of Grey caused pandemonium? Why is it selling so much, asks Nicolson and many others? Forty million copies later, the book’s stirred […]
Posted inLifestyle
The indomitable sex issue
I think we’ve all more or less figured out sex by now. If publications like Amper Twaalf, It’s Perfectly Normal and general sex education didn’t raise suspicion – late night e.tv movies and plain instinct would have led you to the inevitable conclusion that there is something going on down there. Why then do lifestyle […]
Posted inLifestyle
7 reasons to never have sex again, ever
Something occurred to me the other day, as these things do. I was walking out of gym, the endorphins from the exercise setting my mind to meandering like a basset hound following a scent trail in the local park, when a question stated itself. “How would you feel,” asked my inner voice, “if you were […]
Posted inGeneral
Our future with robots
The shape of our technological future is already coming into view, judging by Sherry Turkle’s recent book Alone Together. To be more accurate, if one takes the latest developments in the area of electronic communication, internet activity and robotics, together with changing attitudes on the part of especially (but not exclusively) young users into consideration, […]
Posted inNews/Politics
Criminalising adolescent sexuality — murky waters
I went to a thrilling dialogue at the Commission for Gender Equality last week. The topic was the ages of consent for sex, in terms of our legislation, and the complications that the current legislation has. At the moment the law (the Sexual Offences Act) says that if you’re 16 years and older you can […]