It is a legal contract regardless of whether it is under African customary law, common law, Christian traditions and its parallels in Judaism and Islam
marriage
Posted inEquality, Lifestyle
The paradox of customary marriages
Just because they are performed differently from civil unions does not mean they don’t come with the same responsibilities — people just don’t know it
Posted inEquality, Lifestyle
‘Ubuhle bendoda, izinkomozakhe’ and the trouble with paying lobolo
By Refiloe Makama “Men are never ugly”. Nnu Ego makes this statement in Buchi Emecheta’s novel, The Joys of Motherhood, set during the colonial period in Nigeria. In a scene between two friends, the protagonist Nnu Ego had recently lost her first child, and Ato, her childhood friend comes to comfort her. In a memorable moment, […]
Posted inEquality, Gender violence, General, Health, Lifestyle
For black women, marriage is not a happily ever after
By Refiloe Makama On the 19th of May 2018 the world watched the wedding ceremony of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle at St George’s Chapel, Windsor Castle. With over 29 million people watching, the wedding was filled with every detail that marks a ‘true fairy-tale‘. Right here at home, every Sunday on the popular channel Mzanzi […]
Posted inEquality
Who died and made you a marriage expert?
By Mpho Buntse The rainbow nation, as South Africa is affectionately known, was abuzz with praise from international Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Intersex (LGBTI) pressure groups, the shallow voices of the same sex marriage critics mattered less, and media organisations, even those that are known to be ridiculously conservative towards LGBTI affairs, flaunted on […]
Posted inLifestyle
When a boy becomes a man
I am proud to have met and known a youth who has consciously chosen to become a man, a son who, in his own right, has become a father and a head of a family. I feel that becoming a man, a father, a husband and a head of the family at the age of […]
Posted inHealth, News/Politics
What good is tradition if we lose a penis?
Recently a young man lost his penis. The member in question was lost during an initiation ritual and when he attempted to ask the elders what to do about it (raising the matter in a public forum) he allegedly received a beating. The reason he got this beating? Because by speaking out the initiate was […]
Posted inEquality, Gender violence, General, Lifestyle
The powerful politics of love
South Africans have woken up each morning for the past month to the intimate politics of love (and loss) on their television screens and newspapers pages. The death of Reeva Steenkamp and the ongoing trial has placed questions of love and how we love at the centre of the social consciousness. Although unrelated from the […]
Posted inEquality, News/Politics
What will King Zwelithini make of the Zulu gay wedding?
KwaZulu-Natal broke new ground recently. Two men, draped in traditional apparel, stood before family, friends and well-wishers. There was music, there was love and I imagine the good-old wedding jitters. They said “I do” and shared a kiss. The newlyweds are Tshepo Cameron Sithole-Modisane and Thoba Calvin Sithole-Modisane. The Sithole-Modisanes are not your “ordinary” young, […]
Posted inGeneral
The ins and outs of same-sex marriages in Zimbabwe and the US
By Anneke Meerkotter The first thing you are confronted with when you walk into the service section of the South African embassy in Harare is a South African department of home affairs poster on the process to register civil unions, including same-sex marriages. Why is this interesting? Because Zimbabwe’s first draft constitution released last week […]
Posted inLifestyle
The twilight of testosterone
Something truly extraordinary is happening in the US labour market. At the beginning of 2010, it was revealed, that for the first time in the country’s history, women held a majority of the nation’s jobs. The dramatic rise of women within the ranks of the gainfully employed shouldn’t be seen as solely an American phenomenon. […]
Posted inLifestyle
Why getting married is like buying shoes
Getting married is a lot like buying a pair of shoes. Think about it. You go into the shoe store, you look around. Maybe you’re there because you actually need shoes, maybe you found yourself in there because there’s a sale on and those sandals looked gorgeous and and and … you just can’t help […]