I’ve been hearing a lot of trash talk around our nation’s local airlines lately, and while I think most of it is probably well-deserved, I’d like to hear your opinions. So let’s have us an informal poll. I’m going to list the airlines up for discussion, along with what I perceive as their pros and […]
Lifestyle
‘Kill the bastards’: Time for a revolution against crime
While the Deputy Minister of Safety and Security, Susan Shabangu, was making her now-famous speech in which she urged police to “kill the bastards”, I attended the opening night of Mike van Graan’s brilliant play Die Generaal at Artscape’s Arena Theatre. The play is, in my opinion, probably Van Graan’s best work and I have […]
All your base are belong to us
Call Centre Girl: Hello. Am I speaking to Diane, please? Me: Yars. CCG: This is the Democratic Alliance. We just need to know if you’re still living at 6 Behr Road. Me: [Whoa. Who needs the Scorpions?] No. I … um … moved to Woodstock. CCG: What is your new address there? Me: [Don’t panic. […]
Girls on film
Being a suckling young media consumer, I can flick through DStv channels with all the dexterity and fervour of a dog digging a hole. Recently, I’ve been trying to reconnect with my generation, because being a jazz- and folk-loving bookworm at twentysomething is “so not on”, but I am simultaneously incensed and jaded by the […]
1 000 Tiny Things I Hate
I have written about funny websites before, but this one takes the cake, the pudding, the pie and every other sweet treat that wins a prize. Check out http://tinythingsihate.blogspot.com/ and I dare you not to laugh! Written by Jon Brown, a young comedy writer from the UK, it’s basically a list of extremely amusing and […]
Let’s put our breasts together for …
Submitted by Claire Baker I’m surprised no one else has written about this topic. Perhaps it is too trivial, or perhaps our contributors have been momentarily distracted by what the day has to offer. I’m even more surprised to find myself writing about it. After all, I don’t look that bad in a Wonderbra, so […]
Tepid peppermint wonderland
In Durban, it’s always green. In summer, in spring, in autumn, even in winter when the rest of the world dries out to become a dull, brownish grey. It’s also never really cold. Even the chilliest nights pale in comparison to some of the cooler nights that are already setting in here in Jo’burg. That’s […]
I read You magazine
There! I said it! Scandalous, isn’t it? Only, that “read” is past tense. Read. I read it, once, last week. And admittedly, the only reason I bought it was because my novel, Strange Nervous Laughter, was favourably reviewed in it (how’s that for fame? I’m reviewed in You magazine!) But I have to admit, I […]
Ten places I’d sooner live than have a green card
The way America touts its green card about the world and around the internet in “green-card lotteries”, as if we were all desperate to live in the US, gives me the zig. What is it about the “American Way” that is so off-putting? Is it the way Americans love to pat themselves on the back […]
Public open space — my right of access!
Last weekend I spent some time collecting signatures for a petition to stop the development of the Sea Point Pavilion in Cape Town. The development being planned consists of a hotel on one side of the Sea Point swimming pool and a three-storey shopping complex, restaurants, a gymnasium and other retail outlets on the other […]
Job reservation and egg on my blackface
Job reservation, which ensured jobs for white Afrikaners, especially in the civil service, was always one of the more insidious aspects of grand apartheid, but even something as foul as this can have its funny side. Flip forward a few decades to the new brand of job reservation — “whites, especially males, need not apply”, […]
Property versus renting among the youth
I am currently in the process of buying a home. It has been one of the most time-consuming and irritating times of my life; not only because the prices of houses are ridiculous, but also due to the fact that banks make it almost impossible for one to get a home loan. One is treated […]