The next time I hear a member of the Scorpions, NPA, a government minister, a current judge, a prosecutor or anyone else charged with “upholding our laws” moaning about the Zuma decision then best they don’t do it anywhere within earshot of the worst temper our profession has ever produced — mine.

Where do I start?

How about the extremely poor man’s Vusi Pikoli, Mokotedi Mpshe — or am I doing Pikoli a disservice?

“The charges against Zuma were dropped on the grounds that there was collusion between Leonard McCarthy, the former head of the Directorate of Special Operations (DSO), and former NPA boss Bulelani Ngcuka. This was after among others, transcripts of telephone calls between the two men were investigated and found to amount to manipulation and abuse of process. Mpshe said the merits of the charges and whether Zuma was guilty or not had not been taken into account in the decision. ‘We are not dealing with the merits, we are dealing with abuse of process … It does not mean an acquittal.’ Keeping an even demeanour, Mpshe said while the charges had been dropped, the information uncovered into the abuse and misconduct would be further investigated.” News 24

Give this genius the William-Heath-Anything-In-Zuma’s-Favour-is-Fine Award and promote him to head of Eskom. Or has that already been promised to Willie Hofmeyr? (Any first-year law students spot the legal flaws in that?) Wait, let me not be nasty I am so so sorry Mokotedi … that you were ever allowed to be appointed head of the NPA. It looks so much better on an opportunist like Hofmeyr. I hope Hofmeyr who was so adamant that the charges be dropped will tell us why.

But that is now done and dusted. If I hear of any of you geniuses posing as men of integrity telling the public how you are investigating all that went on surrounding the charging of Zuma even your grandchildren won’t be able to shake the stigma I’ll leave you with. Just make sure you get your 30 pieces of silver and spare us.

Next to the above geniuses I’m starting to feel kindly towards Hlophe and Motata.

Of course the fact that there has been a “political conspiracy, tapping of phones of highly senior politicians, prisoners released by correctional services without basis and charges dropped without proper foundation and not once the words NATIONAL SECURITY raised or anyone suspended means? It means that if you belong to the team you do what you like, steal what you like and nobody does a thing.

God help the masses of South Africa. And God help any of you that steal one bean from our poorer communities because I will make you so famous your granny will disown you.

If McCarthy and Ngcuka are not facing a barrage of charges, plus extradition this morning what does that mean? Sorry I nearly forgot: It means Mpshe (who was probably once a he) will be so so so so sorry. And that South Africans is the sum total of your justice system.

Why are we not watching as the masterminds behind the political conspiracy MAKE THEIR WAY TO PRISON based upon the enormous damages they inflicted on this country. Of course we know Mpheshe (something like that… is sorry) but is it not rather because nothing at law justifies the dropping of the Zuma charges and all we are looking at is two blackmailers staring each other down?

The tapes simply proving that while one was involved in corruption, the other was using the state machinery to dump him?

Instead of wasting more of the taxpayers’ money let’s just start a quiz: Guess if there’s a crime that Zuma or Mbeki have committed that Heath, Hofmeyr and I’msosorry Mpshe actually consider a crime.

Which leaves Selebi?

If I was the former police commissioner I would point blank refuse to accept a trial in this country. Why? Because quite frankly the legal system is a joke and which judge worthy of the name would you as a South African citizen consider merits the term? Maybe we make Hofmeyr from the “I led the drop the Zuma charges campaign” a judge and he can then tell us all how serious crime are and how preffalent. And for appeal we refer it to William “because Zuma said so” Heath.

Gentlemen of what was once the great South African legal profession and ancillary fields between you, you are not worth a bucket of puke.

If the ANC fails to deliver to the masses of this country because members of the old boys’ club have their snouts so deep in the trough, and like Mbeki before you, you call upon the police and army to sort out your garbage then God help you because for all the religious talk I’m hearing that is the only place you may be getting any aid at all.

When I said give Zuma a political solution before it destroys our criminal justice system and our country nobody listened.

Good luck trying to prosecute big criminals from now on guys — nobody is going to give a rat’s arse about these cowards. Besides they’ll be too busy using the state’s resources punishing me and everyone else that shows them up for the garbage they truly are.

NPAs Zuma decision cartoon thumbnail
Cartoon: NPA drops Zuma charges

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Michael Trapido

Michael Trapido

Mike Trapido is a criminal attorney and publicist having also worked as an editor and journalist. He was born in Johannesburg and attended HA Jack and Highlands North High Schools. He married Robyn...

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