McCain vs Romney, Clinton vs Obama: Super Bowl 42 will identify the next US president

Call me crazy (OK, crazier than usual) but doesn’t the Democratic and Republican primaries remind you of the race for this year’s Super Bowl?

First off we have the NFC where the New York Giants (has to be Hillary Clinton as the Senator from New York) beat the Green Bay Packers to reach the grand final. If I am not very much mistaken, then one of Clinton’s main arguments against Barack is the fact that he is inexperienced or GREEN.

Not good news if you are hoping Obama goes all the way to the White House, as I happen to do.

Of course the Giants overcame Green Bay, which, based on my system, means that come convention time, Hillary Clinton will be cracking the Democratic nod.

Which means I’ll be crying in a coffee shop near you.

In the AFC the New England Patriots came up against the San Diego Chargers. (If you ever want to read the funniest book on the NFL, get hold of Gene Klein’s First Down and a Billion — the story of his acquisition and then day-to-day running of the Chargers.)

As the Governor of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, Willard (Mitt Eish ja) Romney has to be the Patriots runner and John McCain the political “maverick”, which can also mean a wild horse, the Chargers.

McCain is, of course, the US pilot who was shot down during the Vietnam War and spent five long years as a prisoner-of-war: five years of being tortured, degraded and beaten … many of you reading this are married, so I won’t labour the point. You get the general idea.

Interestingly enough, though, when Ronald Reagan vetoed in 1986 a comprehensive Bill on sanctions against apartheid South Africa, McCain broke Republican ranks in order to overturn that veto. The anti-apartheid movement should have given him the OR Tambo Award rather than even considering John Minto.

Even more interesting is that Super Bowl XLII is being played in Phoenix, Arizona, and McCain is the senator from Arizona, which makes the fact that Romney’s Patriots ousted McCain’s Chargers a bit upsetting — I’m pulling for McCain.

Mind you, there are two great songs that could sort this out: By the Time I Get to Phoenix and Yes, I’m Going Back to Massachusetts. McCain is on his way to the Super Bowl while Romney, despite the Patriots winning, is going home on the next bus.

But that would mean the comparisons I’ve drawn are of no use and kill my system for predicting the winner.

So it’s going to be Mitt Romney from the Republicans against Hillary Clinton from the Democrats.

The winner?

If the Patriots do go 19-0, then it’s Romney on his way to the White House and Hillary can kill Bill, then start writing her next memoirs, in the coffee shop with the big tears.

If, however, the Giants do continue their 10-on-the-road winning streak, then it’s Bill and Hill inviting you to the house on the hill and Mitt can go and tell everyone that his third cousin in New Jersey has an aunt who once knew a guy who had sold a pair of shoes to a baker who sold a doughnut to a man who once marched with Martin Luther King.

Figuratively speaking, of course.