Diary of Mondli Makhanya, Comrades runner

May 24th 2009 Comrades Marathon

Dear Diary

4am
Haven’t slept a wink knowing I’ll be out on that road for hour after hour after hour. How many more times must I write down “Don’t drink and speak to geniuses from charities” before I start taking my own advice? Dear mother of all things holy, I’m going to make myself the biggest doos since Kortbroek!

5am
Brought diary along to record the event — I’ve just had a positive thought! If I finish inside six hours I’ll have loads of time to spend in Durban and maybe even go down to the beach! Who said it was going to be just slogging? Mind you, I’m glad I put in that hour of jogging every month … should stand me in great stead.

6am
We’re off and I’m looking adorable in a set of boxer shorts in black with a crimpolene T-shirt. I’ll start off by walking until the crowd thins, jogging the next 10 and picking up the pace for the last 78 kms. I’m having a ball.

9am
Man, it’s good to have that first kilometre behind you! I’ve been wading through plastic bags and containers for what seems hours. Better pick up the pace … I haven’t seen another runner for the last two hours. I think I’m getting the bends or is that from diving? Remind me never to write a sports article.

12 noon
I have to admit that the second kilometre was a lot tougher than the first. I don’t know why people waffle about the overcrowding on this race — I haven’t seen a soul for hours. Good thing I bought cash, they tell you all that crap about watering stations and the like but if I hadn’t had money on me I wouldn’t have been able to afford those russians and chips. Mind you, the Coke was flat by the time I had a chance to drink it.

10pm
Just seen a sign that says 10km but can’t be sure if that’s a race sign or a motorway sign. It’s pitch black out here. I don’t remember watching this race in the dark. Hope I’m not lost!

May 25, 3am
Surely I should be out of Pietermaritzburg by now. If I can just make it to one of those watering stations and get directions I should be okay. My blisters have got blisters on them. That’s the last time I listen to a moron who tells me to run in my Jarmins!!

May 28, 12h00 noon
Six more sleeps and I should be in Durban. My shoes are now stuck to the soles of my feet. I think I’m becoming delirious, I keep seeing my face on milk cartons. Wonder if they got the paper out on time…?

June
To me June has been the finest part of the race…

Go Mondli (and don’t let me talk you out of it!)