Dear God, South Africa could really use your help again

Dear God

Sorry to bother you again, but you did such a splendid job with that Rainbow Nation miracle in the early 1990’s, we’d really appreciate it if you could glance our way again because things are looking decidedly dodgy.

For starters, ANC members are fighting among themselves and it has got so nasty that I’m sure Machiavelli, wherever he is, will be doing cartwheels of joy.

Even St Nelson has decided that discretion is the better part of valour. While he was happy to take on the entire apartheid regime he appears extremely reticent about getting in between the Thabo and Jacob factions. And not without good reason. Quite apart from both sides making mincemeat of just about every principle he ever stood for, given the level of political gamesmanship right now and the resultant argy-bargy among the Scorpions, SAPS and NPA, he could well find himself back in Pollsmoor Prison for just daring to give an opinion.

Nothing, but nothing is impossible anymore in this Afrodisneyland we call South African politics. Gee whillikers, it’s almost getting as bad as the USA.

Frankly, divine guidance is now no longer an option but fast becoming an urgent necessity.

Tolerance and respect for one’s fellow beings — something with which you endowed all religions, is now, with respect, entirely out of the window.

In fact, there seems to be so much hatred around in just one political party that it is making that infamous Night of the Long Knives sound as though it was nothing more than a handful of people trying to stab each other in the back with partially inflated sausage skins.

It’s like a Marx Brothers film festival down here with political leaders being charged with strings of crimes the minute they are elected to lead and some who have already been found guilty of crimes almost automatically being elected to lead. Seems like being guilty of a crime or being charged with some sort of criminal activity is now a pre-requisite for political office.

Damn it, we seem to be following Australian history to the letter. Oops, what profanity I speak! My apologies, God, for having said the word Australian in Your presence.

Then, there are people whose job it is to ensure that the law should be obeyed being arrested by other people whose job it is to make sure the law should be obeyed and ending up coming before other people whose job it is to make sure that the law is being obeyed and either being exonerated or charged in which case they still get exonerated but the charge inevitably gets charged and fired from his job.

It is very confusing and if you have ever wondered just what is going on in the minds of people like Robert Mugabe, George Bush, those two childish idiots in Kenya and that fellow in Weskoppies who thinks he is Mother Theresa, don’t even try and fathom what is going on in the minds of our political leaders right now.

Your urgent influence is desperately required in our neck of the woods. Please.

You need to impress upon all of your various flocks in this country that it is very naughty to condemn anyone until a court of law has found them guilty.

There’s a lot of that going about right now.

But, you also need to somehow convince those influential politicians who have been found guilty of a crime or who might be having to wait till August to find out of they are guilty of committing a crime, that given a second chance, they will amend their ways and dedicate their lives to the betterment of their countrymen.

I know, I know, we’re talking mega-miracles here. But a miracle is the only way I can think of to get politicians to turn their backs on megalomania and money and start giving morality a shot.

Dear God, its becoming a mess down here. It really is.

Devoutly yours

South Africa

PS. While you are at it could you have a look at our interest rates too?