Disclaimer: I aim to offend no one person or group of people with this blog, really, I don’t. A lot has been done in terms of attempting to teach the South African public about the dangers of unprotected sex and, looking at the statistics of infection rates of terminal sexually transmitted diseases, one would be […]
The Sumo
The Sumo is a strapping young man in his late 20s who considers himself the ultimate transitional South African. Born and raised in a KwaZulu-Natal township near Durban, he was part of the first group of black initiates into the "multiracial" education system. He was (and is) always in contrast to the norm, black in "white" schools, a blazer-wearing coconut in the township streets, and now fat in a sea of conventional thinness in the corporate world. This, and a lifetime of junk-food consumption and beer guzzling, has culminated in the man you will come to know as the Sumo. See life through this man's eyes; see life through lard.
Posted inGeneral
Sdudla – it’s bigger than you!
Disclaimer: I aim to offend no one person with this blog, really, I don’t. For the non-Zulu among us, first of all, sympathies that you are not spawn from the loins of men who belong to arguably the greatest warrior Nation on Earth; and you do not have royal Zulu blood coursing through your veins. […]
Posted inLifestyle
Fatness and the void of dignity
There is very little dignity or coolness in being fat. Though people try to tell you differently, that you are normal, there are few occasions when fatness may be misconstrued as a positive. Yeah, there is winter, but that only comes around once a year and although the ladies are quite forthcoming during this rather […]
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Commute to Bloem, Part 1
It was with much difficulty that I accepted a directive to pack my bags and haul my great self off to the land beyond the Lesotho Mountains for business purposes. Trust me, had I a choice, I would have never chosen to go to Bloemfontein, but alas, the man that pays my salary demanded it […]
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It’s easy for you and I
Let me start by unequivocally stating that I reject in the strongest terms the violence that has been unleashed upon defenseless foreign nationals in the townships and shanty towns of our country lately.,African on African violence reminiscent of the divide and conquer strategy mastered by the old regime. But – and there is a very […]
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Violence is not a game
There has been an exponential increase in the rate of reported cases of violence in our schools of late and this time the focus is not on the violence brought about by drug dealing gangsters terrorizing our young ones with a promise of something rather ‘ighry to puff on or snort. No, the violence that […]
Posted inLifestyle
Fresh grief
Death is serious business. It means the ending of a life of a person who once had dreams and aspirations that may or may not have been reached, but after the event of death, all is nullified and those dreams are terminated, if not bestowed upon the next generation for their longevity. It was so […]
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On board the MSC Volkstaat
With the blatant racial discrimination that has hit our beloved rainbow nation lately, I feel compelled to explore possible solutions to this age-old racial-superiority point of contention where some feel that it is their right to be held in a higher status than other racial groups. Plainly, it sickens me to know that there are […]
Posted inLifestyle
In the eye of the beheld
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Well, it used to be thus anyway, but now beauty has moved from the eye of the beholder and is now set firmly in the eye of the beheld. What kind of warped excuse for evolution of the human species is this?! In shrink mumbo-jumbo psycho-type talk, […]
Posted inLifestyle
ANCYL and the tale of the fabled small print
* Not for sale to persons under the age of 18 * There has never been a more redundant piece of small print than the one stated above and which forms a neglected part of the artwork panels for labels of alcoholic beverages in marketing-agency work-boards the country over. Now, obviously bored, the ANCYL leadership […]
Posted inLifestyle
Shamefully homebound, the neighbours are having a field day
What is it about us black people that makes us enjoy each other’s failures so much? Maybe it is the human condition, but in my experience, which is limited to the predominantly black community (except for my Indian neighbour) in which I grew up, it seems that black people enjoy each other’s failures way more […]
Posted inLifestyle
Screaming queens and the camera-wielding gunman
I have had a tough couple of weeks at work, with the madness of my being actually expected to produce high-quality innovation in the fast-food industry for our customers continued unabated. You would not have blamed me for suggesting a few quiet beers with a colleague of mine after we worked late on a Thursday […]