Sunday Rose? Try "Vorsprung Durch Psychopathic"

If Nicole Kidman has named her child ‘Sunday Rose’ then a trend of weird names for children is about to hit the fan. So I figured why not put it to my panel of readers to assist celebrities and politicians from around the world with suggestions for interesting names that they can call their offspring.

How about:

The Mugabes: “Vorsprung Durch Psychopathic” born to Bob and Grace, most of the hospital staff survived the operation and are doing well. The director of photography was shot on location.

The Judge Motatas: “Johnny Walker Five Roses” is doing well, named after her father’s problem of confusing beverage types.

The (GW) Bush: “Yo Harper Nukeler” was born at 6am but no post-op or exit strategy from the hospital has been formalised.

The Gordon Browns: “10p Train Smash” was born to proud parents although dad was having a tough time during Labour and found the whole thing very taxing.

The Zilles: “Sign Here Jacob And Here” was a natural birth as mom is doing away with drugs, but she still protested loudly during the birth.

The Susan Shabangus: “Hit The Deck You Thieving Bastards” was born safely and securely just after midnight. Hospital security guards had to be disarmed and debriefed by psychologists after mom and dad had gone home.

The Pikolis: “Have Anudder Plea Bargain” was safely delivered at 2.04am, all the hospital staff were indemnified against any claims as long as they told the truth.

The Medvedevs: “What You Putin You Get Out” was born with the blessing and permission of his friend Vladimir and staff.

The (Madonna) Ritchies: “A-Rod Whatta Guy” was born by C-section/in Medium B section (something like that). Mother and father (as soon as established) will be fine. (Urban legend, by the way)

The (Holmes) Cruises: “Keep It In Your Pants Tom” was delivered by natural at 11h00. Tom will be fine after he bounced too high off Oprah’s couch. Fortunately it wasn’t a glass ceiling.

Bet you guys anything you like. As soon as the in-crowd gets wind of ‘Sunday Rose’ the names will just keep getting weirder and weirder. If the government (Mrs Traps) and I have our first (I never admit to the current three, not while they look exactly like her ex-boss), I’ve got the name ready.

“Precaution Failure”. (Boy or girl)