Blacks love their white people, even if they are racist.
Many of them are.
We blacks have even coined a term of endearment for them: abelungu bethu, which simply means our superior white people.
You see, when you are black and have the confidence and courage to look a white person in the eye, you recognise their humanity and see them as nothing more than simple, ordinary folk who are your equals.
They are not better or superior because of their skin colour. Thus something in you changes.
I, for one, love white people who are comfortable in their own skins and what it represents in terms of our history.
There are still many white people who are in denial about what “white” means — its benefits and consequences — and especially their deep-seated guilt complex.
They will tell you that they did not benefit from dispossession of land, monopoly of wealth, control of the economy and the perpetuation of economic inequality and exploitation.
This we know to be a blatant lie. They know it, too.
I have watched many white people following contributions to Thought Leader explode into anger and frustration when anyone touched on taboo subjects such as white racism, dispossession of the land, economic control and racial inequality.
Many became irrational and condemn the articulation of this problem as the rantings of a black racist.
Even in day-to-day encounters, whites generally avoid eye contact with a black person when we discuss the issue of colonialism, apartheid and what their role was in opposing it, if at all. They will duck and dive or just tell you to shut up because it has nothing to do with them. It belongs to the past.
But some of us love white people who are willing to confess the sins of their ancestors and how these have come home to roost.
These are white people who have matured enough to accept that which can neither be wished nor washed away. It is a history of racist exploitation and oppression that is still with us today. This always comes with self-conscious collective guilt.
This experience has been shared by other black people.
There is something in the acknowledgement, the recognition, the confession and admission of white guilt that washes over your whole body and makes you breathe a sigh of relief.
There is instant forgiveness, an openness of the human spirit, a deep intuitive connection when this happens.
Of course, not all white people, for instance, own large wine farms with black slaves in 2008. Not all white people are CEOs who earn more than R50-million a year for being executive of big, white corporations that are trekking into deeper into Africa for more profits.
Whites are not some homogeneous group who do everything the same way.
In fact, white racist exploiters and oppressors do not exist in the new South Africa. They were wiped off the land with the signing of the 1996 Constitution.
This whole political thing about white racism, land dispossession, economic control and perpetuating inequality is just a remnant of colonialism and apartheid. It is a label to describe a particular white group that may not have changed since 1652.
But many white people do believe in upholding, promoting and preserving the legacy of colonialism and apartheid.
They will, sometimes, glare at you if you are black with a look that radiates superiority, hatred or contempt. You are just another invisible “kaffir”, a thing without any dignity or respect that deserves to be trampled upon, reduced to a pair of hands.
But, of course, there are other whites who are nice. They would not jump out of a swimming pool or move out of a neighbourhood because “it is becoming too black”. These are the sort of whites who allow the black maid to use their cutlery and eat with the family at dinner time, for instance. They even allow the boyfriend to sleep over during weekends.
Or there are some whites who spend their weekends teaching black children mathematics at a squatter camp. They will collect some left-overs, meant for the dustbin, to feed the poor piccaninnies who go to Saturday classes hungry because their parents drank their meagre wages.
These are the nice white people that blacks call abelungu bethu. In fact, their workers speak about them with pride, warmth and love in their segregated, poor and squalid communities.
These are the nice whites who are considerate and understand that colonialism and apartheid were wrong. They continue to benefit from its consequences simply because they are white.
In fact, they do not like blacks who are aware of the historical facts or discuss sensitive issues that threaten to divide us. These are the whites who do not want to rock the status quo because it will just spoil the rainbow-nation “miracle”.
You see, the thing about colonialism is that it is dead and gone.
Well, the other thing is that apartheid was the white law, unjust as it was. People, especially whites, would be sent to prison for challenging authority and betraying their race.
However, these nice white people always sided with the black people. They would be the ones in leadership positions of black organisations, telling blacks how to deal with the effects of colonialism and apartheid.
And black people admired them and respected them for their humanity.
I am one of those blacks who connect with white people who have overcome the past and fear of black people, especially black racists.
You feel that they are part of something new, have transformed and have broken with the past. They are fellow patriots.
We are holding hands and ready to nurture a new spirit of nation-building.
This is what brings us to accept our common bond as people of the same new nation.
There is some mysterious Madiba magic in being able to open your heart to forget the dreadful consequences of almost 400 years of brutal dehumanisation to melt away just like that.
It is a myth that all white people were responsible for racism, dispossession of the land, economic injustice and institutionalisation of racial inequality. Oh no, not all whites are responsible for exploitation and oppression.
We sometimes make the mistake of generalisation that white people alone were responsible for slavery, colonialism and apartheid. This is ridiculous.
There were always some black cohorts who collaborated with them. These black people continue to exist and do not hesitate to perpetuate the silly notion that blacks were born to serve white people.
Nevertheless, it is time that white people got back their groove.
They should regain their confidence to look black people in the eye and tell them: “I am sorry, my friend, but can we move on now because apartheid is dead and gone. You blacks are now in power.”
After all, what is done is done and cannot be undone. All we can do, hopefully, is to learn from the past. History repeats itself because …
White people need to assert their right to participate in this democracy and be regarded as fellow citizens. They can complain about the power failures, for instance.
In fact, they will only be accepted as such when they claim their right to be.
It begins with the Madiba magic to look someone straight in the eye.