What the %^&* ?

Ever not put an emoticon into a quick SMS, Twitter, IM or email? Ever gotten one that confused the punctuation out of you?

The first two emoticons were proposed by Dr Fahlman. He suggested using :-) to indicate jokes, and :-( to indicate serious matters. Of course, we didn’t listen, and we use the latter to show displeasure. (Which, really, is slightly different from seriousness). Now, imagine that Fahlman made a penny for each time we used one of these …

But of course, you have to be careful. Wikipedia reports this story:

It’s hard to know in advance what character strings will be parsed into what kind of unintended image. A colleague was discussing his 401(k) plan with his boss, who happens to be female, via instant messaging. He discovered, to his horror, that the boss’s instant-messaging client was rendering the “(k)” as a big pair of red smoochy lips.

I:), which is “hee-hee” to the uninitiated.

And if you are uninitiated, here is a quick reference to the more obscure emoticons:

;-) So happy, I’m crying
\~/ My glass is full
:-T Keeping a straight face
:^D “Great! I like it!”
:-o “Wow!”
^5 High five
:-C Really bummed
:-@ Screaming
:-& Tongue-tied
%-) Braindead
(:I Egghead
:-6 Exhausted; wipeout
:O Shocked
8-| Eyes wide with surprise
((((name)))) Hug
:-* Oops!
][ Feeling separate

and my favourite:

(_x_) Kiss my ass

You might have a Wikipedia entry if you are important, but if you are an icon you will have your own emoticon. Really. Say hello to Homer Simpson and Elvis. Try not to send your neck into a spasm when viewing these.

~(_8^(|) Homer Simpson
@@@@ :-) Marge Simpson
C|:-)= Charlie Chaplin
}:-> Devil
@:) Elvis
:-)B Dolly Parton
=|:-)= Abraham Lincoln
*-={:-)}}}> Santa Claus
~8-) Harry Potter
{:o)B->– Enjoy your weekend!