Is it only me, or are lunatic lawyers running the IT asylum?

I would like to share an email with you that, according to its content, may contain information which is confidential, private or privileged in nature. Indeed, I have been advised that I must notify the sender that I am not the stated addressee or such person’s authorised representative.

Moreover, I must refrain from printing, copying, forwarding or otherwise disclosing any information contained in the email or any part thereof, and refrain from reading, storing, using, selling or incorporating any information contained in the email into any database or mailing list.

Of course, you now realise that the email must contain information of such a private and perhaps even shocking nature that you should ensure no young or impressionable individuals are in the vicinity of your computer while you read on. And by the time you read this, I may well have been arrested and be languishing in a jail cell.

Here is the full text, verbatim (except where I have protected individuals by withholding their names and addresses):

To Unsubscribe Please Click Here and Hit SEND

If you can not view the image please contact (address withheld to protect those caught in legal crossfire)

Any electronic mails you receive from an employee, representative or affiliate of Bytestech including any attachments thereto (‘e-mails’), are subject to the following: The e-mail may contain information which is confidential, private or privileged in nature. If you are not the stated addressee (or such person’s authorized representative) you must notify the sender of this fact immediately by return e-mail, fax or telephone and delete the e-mail from your system, refrain from printing, copying, forwarding or otherwise disclosing any information contained in the e-mail or any part thereof, and refrain from reading, storing, using, selling or incorporating any information contained in the e-mail into any database or mailing list for whatever reason, including for purposes of spamming or marketing. Failure to do so may amount to the unlawful interception of a communication, the infringement of copyright and/or the infringement of the right to privacy, thus exposing you to both criminal and civil liability. Neither Bytestech, the sender of the e-mail, any other Bytestech representative or affiliate shall be liable for any loss, damage or expense of whatever nature (including without limitation that caused by the corruption or loss of data, damage to software programmes and interruption of business operations) resulting directly or indirectly from the transmission of the e-mail (including without limitation any malicious software code or viruses transmitted together with the e-mail, or any corruption to or loss of data contained in the e-mail). The views and opinions expressed in the e-mail do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of Bytestech. In particular, no Bytestech representative, employee or affiliate may send unsolicited commercial messages (‘spam’), messages that infringe any third party’s copyright, trademarks or other rights and interests (‘infringing content’) and messages containing content that is offensive, derogatory, racist, defamatory or otherwise unlawful (‘offensive content’).If the e-mail constitutes spam, contains infringing content or offensive content, or was otherwise sent for purposes unrelated to the official business of Bytestech, access, block, delete, copy or otherwise intercept any e-mail sent in reply to the e-mail. Buy1 is the official supplier for Bytestech. Buy1 is not liable for the marketing methods or business practice of its affiliated partners. Bytestech are contractually bound to Buy1 and therefore any form of unsolicited marketing will be dealt with according to the rules and regulations of the contract.Bytestech is an affiliated partner of Buy1. Should you wish to unsubscribe, please send email to:

Click Here to Unsubscribe and hit send.

I assure you, that was the full content of the message: nothing aside from one of the most verbose disclaimers I have yet spotted in an email. Had there been an actual message to go with the disclaimer, my eyes may well have glazed over as I skipped to the end of the mail, as they do so often when I encounter the legal nonsense at the bottom of corporate email.

But because legal nonsense was all it contained, it highlighted just how absurd these disclaimers tend to be. Bytes is not the only offender — it is standard practice in the corporate world to tag an automated disclaimer on to the end of all email passing through the company’s mail server. This is a clear indication that the legal tail is wagging the communications dog. The law allows for a “click-wrap agreement”, meaning that a link to a legal disclaimer or terms and conditions is clearly displayed and that these terms are readily available on the website.

Why don’t lawyers know this? I believe they do, but that they are either:

looking after their bread and butter by making more work for themselves; or
insane.

The latter is the more logical explanation, especially when an email that contains no true message whatsoever is burdened with the same lengthy disclaimer as would one that contains a company’s darkest secrets.