Do you know what you believe? (And a squiz at Zuma's Address)

That squiz at Zuma’s State of the Nation Address comes after my thoughts on beliefs, or beliefs on thoughts; they are interchangeable.

Once upon a time, not so long ago in fact, I thought I would skip a day’s work here in Shanghai and dreamed up the typical excuse that I was sick and settled on stomach problems. In all fairness, I was only going to be skipping one 40-minute lesson as that is all I am required to do every alternative Friday at that particular school which I still freelance for. The rest of the day I am free anyway. Then I thought, “Come on Rod, be a good boy, go do your job, then you are free for the weekend as of 11.40am … ”

A few minutes later I was on the loo with horrible stomach cramps and the image of a demented garden sprinkler was going through my mind.

Typical. Saints and anchorites have blessed experiences, epiphanies, visions of ladders with angels mincing up and down the steps between heaven and earth … this Irish South African in a flash managed to “talk” himself into — literally — a truly shit day. And I wasn’t, ahem, exactly back at work in a flush. I couldn’t, after all, go do that lesson. Did I really talk myself into a stercoraceous experience? (Yippee! I’ve wanted to use that big word for a long time. “Which big word Rod,” erudite readers ask, “you mean ‘experience’??”) It was just too much of a coincidence and “talking” myself into being sick has happened to me at least twice before in my life. The first was in primary school as I wanted to bunk school and ended up in hospital with a fever for two weeks which the doctors could not understand. I just lay in bed and read comic books, way cool.

An interesting philosophical question I started to pose in my recent “Discrimination and Intimidation” blog was, is there a world outside of a person’s beliefs, that is to say, what he has “talked” himself into or “been talked” into? Jean-Paul Sartre was nauseated by the sight of tree roots in Nausea, other people would simply have a marvellous shag on the tree roots, then lounge about, gaze up at the sky through the nodding foliage, oblivious to all that queasy potential beneath them.

Take criticism in South Africa: I don’t know if our country is mature enough yet to handle criticism, especially the satirical sort. Why? Is it because their beliefs are all there is, and all else is tosh, a fiction? If you are not a vigorous supporter of the ANC, some will avow, then you are a racist. I know. I see comments like that on my blogs and on others. If I write about the rights being sold to view Mandela’s funeral … well then I must want to joyfully dance on his grave. What bollocks. I hugely respect the man and was there on the day he was released in Cape Town’s City Square back in 1990, cheering along with the crowds. Have a Noddy badge, Rod.

But what is going on here, in terms of such blinkered beliefs? Well, it seems clear to me that many people do not read the text that is plainly in front of them in black and white. They read and reinforce their own unexamined beliefs, unable to acknowledge or stand back and open themselves up to fresh possibilities. Surely growth has a lot to do with trying out fresh possibilities?

I mean, the sun is very rarely allowed to rise as the sun, is it? It’s either Homer’s rosy fingers or the mighty Zeus charging along in his chariot. “Nope Rod, I empirically just see the sun rising as the sun.”

“No you don’t.”

“Yes I do, dammit.”

Wrong. The sun does not rise actually, as we all know. It goes around the sun; so it’s the earth that is actually always rising and falling around the sun. We’re actually “talking” a belief we don’t believe. The old, wrong belief of the rising or sinking sun is still embedded in our language even though we know the phenomenon is no longer so. And trying to change that belief nearly got Galileo into extremely hot water when he tried to rattle the theocentric beliefs of the time. He had to retract or he would have experienced some of the finer blessings the Catholic Church of the time could dole out. Fellatio wasn’t one of them.

“It was.”

“Wasn’t.”

“Was. Ever done it? And swallowed?”

“Okay, okay. Maybe. Can’t you just zip it up for once?? I’ve got a blog to write here.” Clears throat, unconsciously rubs lips and gulps.

Okay, I know you all know the Galileo thing. But the fascinating thing is, if that is just one unexamined belief that is carried around, the rising sun, how many others do we wittingly or unwittingly have?

“The unexamined life is not worth living!” thundered Socrates at his heresy trial. Well I like to believe (there! See how that devil of a word keeps popping up like hot toast?) he thundered those words. I doubt he bleated them as he stood there defiantly, facing death, and those words still resonate through thousands of teachings today.

So: onto President Jacob Zuma’s State of the Nation Address. A good template to refer to as we watch the progress of any government and nation, is the Address given by the newly elected leader, what promises and strategies were made and so forth. But …

Sorry, Mr Zuma, I am not much for presidential addresses and speeches, I believe (damn that nuisance of a word!) they are too lofty, abstract, and words are cheap … but I read your speech.

“Our nation has over the past few years gone through very challenging times [I nearly switched off after that agonising truism]. It is thanks to the fact that we have a strong and fully functional constitutional democratic system [I beg to differ, but will plough on … ], with solid institutions, that we overcame these difficulties smoothly and with dignity [Did we now? Ask the family survivors of unnecessary Aids deaths, ask the survivors of victims of township xenophobia, the direct result of the government having no stance to speak of on Zimbabwe]. Today’s occasion is a celebration of what makes this democracy work. It is also a celebration of our culture of continuity [if it’s going to be a “celebration of the continuity” of many of the woes of the last government then I am deeply concerned] and collective responsibility.”

And so forth.

Though I liked Zuma’s positive tone — I am a sucker for positive language (“emphasise sucker, pal, you’re onto that fellatio thing again, ha ha,” “FFS I wish I didn’t have you for an alter ego” “Don’t you mean altar ego?”) — the speech was all too abstract for me, though I respectfully want to believe (see? The word keeps coming like Madonna) that Zuma and his team will bring about constructive changes and not a “continuity” of the recidivism I see through my belief-lens … So I sped-read the rest of the speech, wanting to find something substantial, measurable. I stopped at the following concrete, quantifiable sentence: “Between now and December 2009, we plan to create about 500 000 job opportunities.”

Now that’s something I can get my teeth into. I will be watching to see if this plan will come into effect. But I am concerned about the choice of words. You see, “opportunities” as lawyers and politicians all too hastily will point out does not mean actual filled posts and gainful employment. But perhaps I am too much a stickler for words.

I may be an ex-pat but I truly want South Africa to work. I have read and heard with horror South Africans wanting the World Cup 2010 to fail miserably. That would have devastating effects on the economy. Those statements are guided by unexamined or denied beliefs.

It does seem that so much is a result of what we believe. Psychology 101: If a child believes she can catch a ball, she is more likely to catch the ball. If we believe a nation can and will work and progress, she is more likely to. What say ye? What believe ye? Examine the latter question carefully before sounding off with the former.