The Central Defamation Fund

Right, so the aim of the Media Appeals Tribunal is to (allegedly) assist people who want to take on the media by providing them with a platform with which to seek some form of redress for some hurtful comments or stories that may have been written about them in the media.

At present our Law of Defamation forms part of the Law of Delict, a system of laws that determine how you must go about proving your damages, if you feel you have suffered damages of some sort. An important consideration, when dealing with the Law of Delict, is that you only get what you prove. So if you can only show R1 000 in damages, you will only get R1 000. Unlike the American courts, our courts do not award damages for pain and suffering. The problem with litigation is that it is expensive. After all, lawyers are entitled to earn a decent wage surely?

So taking government statements at face value, we need to find a way to assist potential litigants. The government remains dedicated to the principle of freedom of speech (bearing in mind, you can say what you want, provided you do what you are told). This is where I had a stroke of genius early this morning … Let’s increase the price of petrol by 10c/l. This money will be paid into a Central Defamation Fund. Anyone who feels that their reputation has been tarnished in some way by those evil people called journalists, can then apply to the Central Defamation Fund to have their litigation bankrolled by the South African populace. The principle being that anyone can apply for funding. After all, you never know when you too may be the target of the media! Just look at how they chase down innocent government ministers, holed up in their inexpensive hotels at the taxpayers expense.

I realise that a principle weakness of my Central Defamation Fund is that it lends itself to possible corruption. More jobs for pals, more public money that needs to spent, and importantly, it presents another opportunity to fund an expensive vehicle and hotel stay as the director of the Central Defamation Fund would also be entitled to the use of a blue-light brigade as he/she hunts down those evil journalists. But if you can keep politicians busy with new and exciting means of siphoning off public money, maybe they will forget about the media.

At the end of the day there would be no need for a Media Appeals Tribunal, media independence remains intact, there is no need to amend or introduce laws and make parliamentarians work, the politicians remain happy in their expensive cars and hotels, the lawyers get their slice of the cake and our judges can start doing an honest day’s work. And if a defamation case is never successfully prosecuted using money from the Central Defamation Fund, who cares? It may increase employment in our courts as people roll up to sue the media with what little funds are available. It sounds like everyone will be happy all around. Viva CDF viva!