We’re not in Wasilla anymore, Sarah

You just have to love the irony of it all, notwithstanding the unbelievable spin that would have made Goebbels proud. Mrs Family Values, John McRage’s somewhat quirky running mate, has a pregnant teenage daughter.

Now just because I was chaste as a youngster is no reason to frown on those who indulge. And I don’t. Instead, I scowl at those whose parents preach abstinence and deny their children sex education. My mother didn’t, but I’m not sure there’s any causal link between her actions and my very late sexual debut. But at least I was somewhat prepared were I to stumble across a vajayjay at some point. Pity I wasn’t taught about the delights of the human joystick.

But back to northern exposure country, where – as recently as April 2008 – Governor Sarah Palin “slashed funding to help teenage mothers”. According to the Washington Post, she reduced state funding to Covenant House Alaska – a non-profit organisation that “provides programmes and shelters for troubled youth” – by more than 20%. This happened after the state legislature had passed a “spending bill”, which was then subject to an executive “line-item veto”. And you think T-Boz has centralised power!

According to its website, Covenant House “provides youth with a stable and safe living environment in a residential setting” through its Transitional Living Program (TLP). In Anchorage, Alaska’s largest town, there are two TLP sites. The first site, Rights of Passage, addresses the needs of homeless youth. The second site, Passage House, provides shelter and services to parenting and pregnant young women between 17 and 20. Bristol Palin is pregnant at 17.

Yet this story, unsurprisingly, is not the one that dominates the Republican narrative. That tale is one of love, marriage, the blessing of a child and – most important of all – an unwavering opposition to abortion. Mrs Palin not only talks the talk, but also walks it and lives it too. She recently gave birth to a Down’s syndrome baby, her fifth child, and Bristol will similarly keep her gift from god. “Her daughter is now living the values that Sarah Palin has built into her”, remarked a convention delegate.

I’m not sure about the values preached in the Palin household. For one, mom is apparently not that keen on librarians who are not keen on censorship. According to the New York Times, one of the first things Palin did after becoming mayor of her hometown of Wasilla – population 7 025 – was to enquire about “the possibility of banning some books”. Apparently she first raised the idea of banning books that “were somehow morally or socially objectionable to her” at a City Council meeting.

But she never followed through, quite possibly because the local librarian “pledged to ‘resist all efforts at censorship’”. Or maybe she was “just joking”. In 1996, Palin suggested that the talk of banning books was just “rhetorical”. Joke or not, the librarian was not amused when she received her marching orders. But after receiving local support, Mary Ellen Emmons was reinstated. Yet a couple of years later, she resigned and left the town, and more recently has declined to give any comment. I guess Ms Mary will get even when she casts her ballot for Barack on November 4.

As luck would have it, the cable guy only arrives tomorrow afternoon. Last week, when the Democratic convention was in full flight, I was living it up at a funky boutique hotel down the road, complete with full access to more channels than I could ever want to watch. In real time, albeit from thousands of miles away, I witnessed Obamamania fill Mile High Stadium in Denver. Tonight, however, when Sarah takes the stage in St. Paul, I’ll be watching reruns of “Everyone Loves Raymond” on my20. Interestingly, it’s a channel owned by the Fox network, cheerleaders to all things Republican.