2010: Ready or not!

What’s the first thing you think of when you have visitors coming to your house? Is it not entertainment? It should be. Well, that’s if you do get visitors like mine, who share a jealously guarded appreciation for Charles, Jack and Johnny, mixed with smooth deep-house beats.

I suppose my visitors are no different from me and you. We are just as South African as we could be, and we pride ourselves as a country that knows how to have fun. Sepp Blatter — the poor French oak who had an unusual job of defending a foreign country from eternal pessimists — would testify to that. We dance, sing and blow the vuvuzela like no other natives!

I’m inclined to argue that the Confed Cup never really showcased our ability to entertain. Otherwise why would the Egyptians go seek alternative fun? The entertainment industry failed to rise to the occasion and Pharaoh’s sons were not only caught with their pants down, they got screwed.

I’ve been told that the Indian Premier League cricket tournament and Fifa Confederations Cup attracted about 16 000 and 5 000 visitors respectively. It is unimaginable that with such a huge market on-shore, the vuvuzela and Egyptian adventure hogged headlines when we have a diversity of arts and entertainment to offer.

Over half a million visitors are expected in the country next year. I would be disappointed if they were to leave with pictures of lions and baboons for souvenirs. I’d love to hear stories about how the Germans might be contemplating relocating down south after being savagely embarrassed by the locals in a beer-drinking marathon. After all, we own SAB, don’t we? And — unfortunately, but also unintentionally — the apartheid regime gave us a good practice with the “dop system”.

Another undisputed fact is that South Africans are among the biggest consumers of deep-house music in the world. So how about we make the Spaniards forget how to spell Ibiza while we also teach them how to spell “Boooooooooth”, without any racist connotations.

There’s a restaurant-cum-lounge called Dio Bacco in Norwood, Johannesburg. Impressively so, Dio Bacco is already embarking on projects that will position the venue as a hub for world-class entertainment in 2010. Unfortunately, I’m not in a position to divulge a lot of details, save to say that I wish Dio Bacco’s enthusiasm and determination would rub onto the general entertainment industry.

It is heartening to see South Africans being pro-active and taking the initiative to ensure that the culture and SA way of life will be imprinted forever in the hearts of our visitors. Ready or not, we will rewrite history!