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Cope congress postponed indefinitely

The war between Lekota and Shilowa forced the Congress Working Committee emergency meeting last night to cancel the May 29 Cope conference altogether. Speaking at an emergency press briefing at noon today the party’s embattled secretary-general, Charlotte Lobe, said: “We can’t go to conference in this state. These guys must sort themselves before we go to any conference lest we experience Polokwane 2 and experience another spilt of this movement.”

Meanwhile Smuts Ngonyama has reportedly resigned over the failure to convene the Cope policy conference, stating huge commitments at the Thabo Mbeki Foundation and Elephant Consortium. After much consultation and considering Lindiwe Sisulu’s advice to “go back to church”, Dandala has requested a sabbatical to consider his future. He was seen last week at a meeting of ministers in Khayelitsha, where he was reportedly preparing Methodist ministers for Easter services in what many believe is a trial run for his imminent return to the church.

Cope staff this week will face a wonderful Easter after Cope’s treasurers unilaterally increased their salaries following revelations last week that most of Cope’s debts had been paid. Finally, in a twist of irony, it has been leaked by the Mail & Guardian that former Cope deputy president Lynda Ordenadal has been deployed by Cope to spy on the ANC and there is panic in the ANC that since her arrival, elections documents have been disappearing in drips and drabs and one ANC insider has confessed that “she has shown a suspiciously high appetite to be in strategic committees”.

Issued by JJ Tabane, Ex-Cope Spokesperson Geleshewe Kimberly.