Beverley Merriman

Your attitude in 2008

I love living. I believe in passion, commitment, unconditional love and in positive change. I believe that each one of us has the ability and also ample opportunity to make a difference to the people around us, as well as to the society in which we live. I believe in endless possibility. I believe that the human spirit is truly remarkable.

Too many people today are disgruntled, depressed, sad, morbid, ruthless, greedy or self-absorbed. Obviously, this is a choice as well as a state. To me, attitude and choice are very closely related.

Life is full of surprises [otherwise termed as problems]. How you overcome these will determine your state of happiness, satisfaction, contentedness and success in life. Ultimately, this comes down to conscious choice: a choice to problem-solve with a positive attitude or a choice to be selfishly stubborn and destructive.

I don’t believe life is about you as an individual — it’s about how you contribute to society, starting with the people closest to you and the people you come into contact with. It’s about adding value. It’s about caring. Frankly, it’s about all the small and seemingly irrelevant things that are often taken for granted.

It’s not about winning gold or losing silver, it’s not about power, fame, success or material possessions — it’s the smallest gesture, a kind word or a random act of goodness. It’s about contributing in a passionate manner, with an open mind and an enthusiastic and caring attitude.

Life, to me, is about the basics — it’s about honesty, love, responsibility and a quest to reach your potential through using every grain of talent you have.

Choosing to ignore the small things that make life special is undoubtedly sad. Choosing the negative over the positive, the destructive over constructive, doesn’t make sense at all. It uses the same [if not more] energy, effort and intellect.

It’s a sin to waste a brilliant mind, talent or opportunity because of a miserable attitude. Ill-treating people, having no respect for human emotion, little regard for consequence and shockingly little remorse over one’s actions is absolutely incomprehensible. Going through life with a morbid, sad-arsed attitude is shameful.

No satisfaction, love and success can ever be obtained through selfishness and negative thoughts. No one can truly live when they are caught up and entangled in mistakes and past happenings. No one can contribute positively when stuck in this mode. It is a fact of life that wrong choices will sometimes be made, but experiencing that as a way of learning, a method of refining the way in which future decisions will be taken and dealt with, is what is important. Good choices are the ones that move you, inspire you and renew your inner energy.

Attitude influences choices. Choices are deceptively easy to make — making the right choice is slightly harder. Ultimately the key to life and good choices is giving, sharing and contributing positively. Choose the can-do attitude and the problem solving mindset and embrace life.

Why not create your state? Why not direct your life to manage and maintain these emotions and attitudes?

  • http://www.nickvanderleek.com Nick

    I think it’s also fair to suggest that the way people are is simply equilibrium to what is happening around them (real and/or imagined). I think the amount of narcicism currently running rampant in society (and blogs are just one symptom of our self-absorption) points to the chronic levels of neglect and disconnectedness.

  • Mfundo

    I’ve been reading the Thought Leader extracts quite frequently and most really enhance my general knowledge, therefore an daily newsletter would compliment my day.

  • http://www.tylerreed.co.za Tyler

    Great post Beverley! I am a firm believer in creating my own state of mind. With the right attitude, anyone can achieve anything!

  • Fanie

    What an interesting thought to start the new year πŸ˜‰
    Can this please come in printable versions that focus only on the subject matter and not the whole document.

    Thanx.

  • http://www.sabusinesswarrior.com George A Isaacs

    I could not agree more Beverley. Problem is that people have become so conditioned by society that most of them cannot operate outside the “traditional box” anymore. Their values and beliefs are shaped by what others think of them – mostly negative. As a result, they do not think positive of themselves. Even when one tends to be positive, the general tendency of society is to react negatively towards one.

    As a child already I held the belief that people only think of one as one thinks of self. Therefore I belief that I am special, one of a kind and capable to achieved more than what society offers. This has led people to label me as boastful and conceited. However, I have achieved most of the things that I dreamt about and at the age of 48 regard myself as well balanced, happy and successful, while most of my childhood friends are still struggling and many have become alcoholics and legal drug addicts – on constant medication for stress and depression.

    Your state of mind will not only influence your achievements in life, but also whether you become a responsible, loving and caring person.

    Choice is a the key to success and happiness. It remains our own choice whether we go through life as miserable, depressed underachievers, or become the “achievers” in society.

    It is all about “The Power of Positive Thinking”.

    Have a great 2008!

  • http://out-think.blogspot.com Darren

    Bev, really good perspective on a touchy subject, since we usually look at fixing our attitude as meaning there is something wrong with us. Which is not true – its just one of the final ingredients required to extract maximum value from our talents, abilities and lives.

    George, very good points, but I would ask if it isn’t something more than just positive thinking that is required? After all, without a good reason for doing things, there’s no motivation for a positive attitude. I would say we need an underlying strong belief in our reason for being – which then drives motivation for ‘thinking positively’ and allows the necessary attitude adjustments. Still incredibly difficult in practice though…

  • Owen

    Well said, positive caring actions normally lead to a no regrets life style.

  • http://www.feistyfemale.com Beverley Merriman

    Nick – I realise that society is negative, but I believe that the secret lies within each of us to make a difference. Even a small act, or small effort can make a big impact. Maybe a positive attitude will breed more positive attitudes!

    Mfundo – You can subscribe to the email newsletter. Check out the top right-hand corner of your screen.

    Tyler – Thanks for the comment, and thank you for being a living example that a positive attitude breeds success and opportunity!

    Fanie – You want to print this? Really, really? πŸ˜‰ I will pass on your request to the Thought Leader team asap!

    George – Thank you for your much valued comment and contribution. May you indeed have a smashing, exhilarating, high-achieving 2008!

    Darren – Very good point! A big part of being positive is wanting to be positive! What motivates a positive attitude? Well, I believe this is different for each individual. My drive and motivation to a positive can-do attitude is this: adding value to others and making a difference – even in the life of only one person. It’s something that is immensely touching, inspirational, refreshing and satisfying. Perhaps adding value is a universal motivator for the human specie?

    Owen – That is an awesome way of looking at it!

    The response from this post has astounded me. I will be writing a follow up on this next week, for sure! A big thank you to everybody who has read this, and took the trouble to comment. It has inspired me and motivated me tremendously! Have a super 2008!

  • http://www.henriska.com/blog/ Marius

    Bev, I cannot agree more with you in this. Just imagine what the world would be if we all go about our daily life with a positive attitude and love and compassion for the people around us. Unfortunately I have found in real life things are not that simple. What gets me is how self absorbed, selfish people are and easily throw things back in your face when one start to care for people around you.

  • http://msithundasars.gov.za mvuseleli

    wise words, as a man thinks in his heart so is he meaning you think negative you will attract negative things in your life, think positive and you will atrract positive things in your life.

  • http://imod.co.za/ Chris M

    Lovely post Bev!

  • Nomathemba

    I was telling a friend today, how incredibly hard I find it to be positive. One is bombarded with upsetting stuff on the news, on the net, in one’s life. It’s like that quote “hell is other people”.

    I suppose we cannot just sit around and hope for this positive attitude, it requires hard work and positive results.

  • Sameerah

    For those of you searching for how to live that positive life I strongly suggest Louise L. Hay- You can heal your life. Don’t shift the responsibility of your happiness onto others- its your choice, there always is a choice!

  • http://www.miasolutions.co.za/blog Henre

    Hi Bev, I’m finally back from holiday and trying to apply my mind to some work. (being a Saturday and all).

    This is a great post and one certainly worthy of the positive comments.

    A new year, inevitably, is always about change. To highlight your sentiment, I believe the positive influencers have a duty to cast their beliefs, their optimism, their courage and their will to succeed onto those that are meandering along the line of skepticism, depressive thoughts and lackluster behaviour.

    We need to carry those people and show them the true value of a positive frame of mind. It pays dividends in all other aspects of life, something very difficult to comprehend when your mind is clouded with negativity.

    It seems most people are on board. It’s going to be a great year. πŸ˜†

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