Lev David

The Pledge: “We” or “I”

Slapping my forehead and calling myself an idiot, I realise now that something I didn’t think to mention in my column in this week’s M&G (“We, The Zombies”, Page 30) is that it seems absurd to pledge on behalf of anybody else. So the We x 3 thing really doesn’t work. I’d be interested to…

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Five things (other than the pledge) that leave me mystified

Why would a racehorse “pee like a racehorse”? If I didn’t have any pants on and I always had grass beneath me, I’d be letting my wee out in small quantities all the time, not storing it up and carrying it around with me just for dramatic effect. Am I the only one who’s a…

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Five questions and the first law of flatulence

Why can’t nose hairs just be sexy? They’re such a pain to trim. Growing a moustache is a style choice. The same goes for growing a beard. And there are lots of chicks who are into that scrubby bastard look. But the moment you have stuff growing out of your nose (or ears), it isn’t…

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Robert Brand on The Golden Compass

Check out Robert’s post on Christian fundamentalists getting their SMS fingers twitching over The Golden Compass. Yeeeeeesh! Nice little comment thread developing. I’ve just found these two YouTube videos. Every side needs its propaganda “Atheists Are Fools” and “We Are Here: The Pale Blue Dot”. The second one is an amateur reworking of a reading…

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Mohammed: Bad News Bear

Oi! My fortnightly column, A Quiet Riot, runs again in this week’s Mail & Guardian, on sale from today (Friday, 7 December 2007). Here are the first 156 words: Does anybody know if Hindu fanatics have ever started a protest over Yogi Bear? It might surprise you that I’m on the side of the Sudanese…

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Top 5 Burning Questions

Why are people giving me directions around Jo’burg in terms of the cardinal points? “Travel north,” they say. Where the hell is north? I’m a city boy. There are no recognisable natural landmarks up here. I have no compass and I’m not navigating by the sun or the handle of the Big Dipper. Give me…

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